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Internet Predators
 Although children are far more likely to come across sexually oriented content online than to encounter an online predator, the tragedy that can result from having a child cross paths with a predator makes it imperative that a parent understand this issue.
In the physical world, a predator or child molester is usually someone a parent or child knows---someone who might even be trusted by the family. Online, however, it can be a different story. Predators can use the Internet to seek out children they don’t know. When they succeed in establishing and maintaining contact, the informal nature of the medium itself is partly to blame. The usual caution that kids might exercise away from the computer--- walking to school, for example---can gradually erode. By the time a child agrees to meet a predator face to face, he or she no longer thinks of that person as a stranger.
Young teens have a real desire to be free of their parents' authority and gain acceptance as grown ups. But teens are also naive and inexperienced in dealing with adults who have ulterior motives. Sexual predators take advantage of these qualities by manipulating kids in an effort to gain trust, which they use to gradually turn seemingly innocent online relationships into real-life sexual interactions.
A predator usually approaches a child target through initially harmless chat-room or instant message dialogue. Over time--- perhaps weeks or even months---the stranger, having obtained as much personal information as possible, grooms the child, gaining his or her trust through compliments, positive statements, and other forms of flattery to build an emotional bond.
As the child begins to respond to and bond with this person, conversations become more personal. Some predators also pass along sexually explicit images of children to suggest to the targeted child that it’s normal for kids to be involved in sexual activities. From there it could be a short distance to a face-to-face meeting.
If you suspect your child has experienced something inappropriate online or is currently communicating with a potential predator, it's very important that you reach out to them in a calm, nonjudgmental way. Your child may be feeling guilty or even frightened. He or she needs to feel comfortable in talking with you. Get information on what happened and then report it to your local authorities.
If a predator somehow gets your phone number or address and begins harassing your child off-line, contact your local authorities or the FBI immediately.
While the following story is not true, it was written to warn children and parents of the danger of the internet. Predators DO use the techniques below to find out information about children.
 Shannon could hear the footsteps behind her as she walked toward home. The thought of being followed made her heart beat faster. "You're being silly," she told herself, "no one is following you." To be safe she began to walk faster, but the footsteps kept up with her pace. She was afraid to look back and she was glad she was almost home. Shannon said a quick prayer, "God please get me home safe." She saw the porch light burning and ran the rest of the way to her house.
Once inside she leaned against the door for a moment, relieved to be in the safety of her home. She glanced out the window to see if anyone was there. The sidewalk was empty. After tossing her books on the sofa she decided to grab a snack and get on line. There she could talk to strangers without being afraid. After all, no one knew who she really was and couldn't hurt her. She logged on under her screen name "ByAngel213". Checking her Buddy List she saw GoTo123 was on. She sent him an instant message:
ByAngel213: Hi I'm glad you are on! I thought someone was following me home today. It was really weird!
GoTo123: LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don't you live in a safe neighborhood?
ByAngel213: Of course I do... LOL... I guess it was my imagination... cause I didn't see anybody when I looked out.
GoTo123: Unless you gave your name out on line... You haven't done that have you?
ByAngel213: Of course not. I'm not stupid you know.
GoTo123: Did you have a softball game after school today?
ByAngel213: Yes and we won!!
GoTo123: That's great! Who did you play?
ByAngel213: We played the Hornets... LOL..their uniforms are so gross! They look like bees... LOL
GoThere123: What is your team called?
ByAngel213: We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are really kewl.
GoTo123: Do you pitch or what?
ByAngel213: No... I play second base. I got to go.. My homework has to be done before my parents get home. I don't want them mad at me...Bye
GoTo123: Catch you later.. Bye
GoTo123 decided it was time to teach Angel a lesson. One she would never forget. He went to the member menu and began to search for her profile. When it came up he highlighted it and printed it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about Angel so far.
Her name: Shannon. Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985. Age:13. State where she lived: North Carolina. Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this information he knew she lived in Canton. She had just told him. He knew she stayed by herself until 6:30 every afternoon until her parents came home from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday afternoons on the school team and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her jersey. He knew she was in the seventh grade at the Canton Junior High School. She had told him all this in the conversations they had on line. He had enough information to find her now.
"She'll be so surprised," he thought, "she doesn't even know what she has done."
Shannon didn't tell her parents about the incident on the way home from the ball park that day. She didn't want them to make a scene and stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents were alwaysoverreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she was not an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters her parents wouldn't be so overprotective.
By Thursday Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps following her. Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her. It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base position to see a man watching her closely. He was leaning against the fence behind first base and he smiled when she looked at him. He didn't look scary and she quickly dismissed the fear she had felt.
After the game he sat on a bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked past him. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on back of the shirt. He knew he had found her. Quietly he walked a safe distance behind her. He didn't want to frighten her and have to explain what he was doing to anyone.
It was only a few blocks to Shannon's home and once he saw where she lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car. Now he had to wait. He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon's house. He drove to a fast food restaurant and sat there until time to make his move.
Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in the living room. Shannon, come here," her father called. He sounded upset and she couldn't imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the ballpark sitting on the sofa. "Sit down," her father began, "this man is a policeman and he has just told us a most interesting story about you."
Shannon moved cautiously to a chair across from the man. How could he tell her parents anything? She had never seen him before today!
"Do you know who I am Shannon?" The man asked.
"No..." Shannon answered.
"I am your on line friend, GoTo123."
Shannon was stunned. "That's impossible! GoTo is a kid my age! He's 14 and he lives in Michigan!"
The man smiled. "I know I told you all that... but it wasn't true. You see, Shannon, there are people on line who pretend to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to find kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from predators. I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is to give out too much information to people online. You told me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you. Your name, the school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The number and name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze."
Shannon was stunned. "You mean you don't live in Michigan?"
He laughed. "No, I live in Raleigh. It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn't it?" She nodded. "I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn't as lucky. The guy found her and murdered her while she was home alone. Kids are taught not to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on line. The wrong people trick you into giving out information a little here and there online. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you without even realizing you have done it. I hope you've learned a lesson from this and won't do it again."
 "I won't," Shannon promised solemnly.
"Will you tell others about this so they will be safe too?"
It's a promise!"
That night Shannon and her dad and Mom all knelt down together and prayed. They thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.
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The story you just read was not true. Yet it could have happened; it was based on true information given out to me by kids on line. It could easily happen to the teens that chat so freely with strangers. While it is not meant to frighten you, it is a lesson in being safe. This message is for boys as well as girls. They have been victims of predators on line too. The following are ways to protect yourself:
- Never tell anyone your full name, address, phone number, city or any other personal information about yourself or your family.
- Watch what you put on your profile. Don't put your date of birth, especially the year. Remember you are not required to put any information on the profile you don't want to.
- If anyone IM's you or e-mails you and asks where you go to school, where you live or any other personal questions you don't feel comfortable with, do not hesitate to say, " I'm sorry, I don't give out personal information" or "My parents have asked me not to tell that."
- If someone sends you an e-mail form with personal information about themselves on it and suggests you fill one out just like it, be alerted and don't do it. Who knows to where and to whom it will be forwarded!
- If you go into chat rooms and anyone pressures you to talk to them, won't leave you alone or asks for personal information, leave the room immediately!
- If you ever get suggestive, angry or abusive messages tell your parents at once and contact the Internet provider you use and seek assistance.
- Don't respond to e-mail from people you don't know. If you believe you've received something strange, tell your parents.
- Never agree to meet anyone face-to-face that you have talked with online.
For more information, please visit the website .
Helpful Resources for Keeping Our Children Safe Online
Dateline NBC's To Catch a Predator is an ongoing series of undercover stings to catch online sex predators. EVERY PARENT MUST SEE! This site has many resources for parents. Please take the time to visit and watch the videos. They are truly eye-opening and alarming.
i-SAFE Inc. is the worldwide leader in Internet safety education. Founded in 1998 and endorsed by the U.S. Congress, i-SAFE is a non-profit foundation dedicated to protecting the online experiences of youth everywhere. i-SAFE incorporates classroom curriculum with dynamic community outreach to empower students, teachers, parents, law enforcement, and concerned adults to make the Internet a safer place. Please join us today in the fight to safeguard our children’s online experience.
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